Reality Check!

Lisa called Karen and told her that her therapies will soon end. That will be it! She really has plateaued and without some pushing will remain the way she is. Karen, nicely told her that this is the way she is going to be from now on and that it is OK. Lisa didn't like what she heard and pretty much hung up on her.

3 hours later, Lisa called her back and asked her to call the therapists to ask them if she can keep going to therapy. She does not want to be this way. She is in a wheelchair, has no use with her right hand or arm and her entire right side is affected from her stroke. She is alive, and her speech was not affected, something that is a miracle, you can read about that from the Feb 2010 entry from this blog. http://leroyjenkinsclan.blogspot.com/2010/02/wada-test.html Anyway, she is upset about that and truly wants to be the way she was...

She has some people from UCP who are her part time care givers. Sometimes, Karen and I fill in for them so they can have a break or can do other prior committed things with their families. Last night was my turn. I was to  go put her to bed and make sure everything was normal for her. I get there late and asked her to brush her teeth and wash her face...she told me she couldn't. I knew she could, and she did! I walk in to her apt and she is getting ready for bed. She needed some assistance and I walked in just in time. Whew! She was really wanting to go to bed and I helped her do just that.

I talked to her about her conversation with Karen earlier this week and asked her if she remembered how when she was a gymnast that her coach Heather would tell her that she could do things she didn't think she could do and how mom would push her to do things and eventually I became that person (I was her coach). She remembered. I told her that Mom and Heather are no longer here to tell her that she is able to do things and that Karen and I can't be with her all the time...so...now it is up to her to tell people that she can "do it myself" I don't know if that sank in. I pray it did. Lisa can do more than what she is doing, but you can bet that if someone is there and she can get them to do the slightest thing for her, she will!!!! and she does!!!! AND, those people like to "help" her. It is frustrating.

Last week, when I was with her at the hotel, she asked me to help her put toothpaste on her brush! She didn't like it when I told her that she can do it herself. She asked me to put her sock on...HeLLLoooo? ummm, no, you can do that by yourself too? I asked her if she does it at home...No, so and so does it for me! I got mad. I quickly apologized though. I am not with her and I should be more empathetic to her, but darn it, I hate it when I know that SHE can do things for herself, but it requires some effort!

Today, I get a call from Lisa, but I was on another call and did not answer...then when I called her back, there was no answer. That is odd. Karen called me soon after and she told me that Lisa had a grand mal seizure and she was being taken to the ER. I did not remember last night to have Lisa take her meds. 
For all this time, we thought that Lisa's brain surgery worked. We thought that she was seizure free.

I had tears in my eyes when Karen told me and I felt bad for not giving her meds to her. But, to look at things in a positive light...

1. It was me and not a caregiver who gets paid, who forgot her meds.
2. Her surgery was still a success because her seizures are controlled now with her meds.
3. We know now that she still needs her meds...but they have been decreased since Dec.

It just makes me and my dad and sisters, not to mention Lisa, sad. We wanted this to work, it is just so hard to know that her stroke happened because of the surgery and on and on. It's just hard.